Happy St. Patrick’s Day!


A few jokes I was asked to invent at dinner in honor of St. Patrick’s Day:

Q: What do you call half a potato in a small bowl of tepid water?
A: An Irish Martini.

Q: What is the difference between an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman?
A: When an Englishman speaks, anyone in the English speaking world can understand Continue reading

New Feature: Monthly Short Stories

Hi Folks,

I want to announce a new feature here on The Granite Notebook : a monthly short story rotation. I realized the other day that I have written quite a bit of awesome short fiction over the years and need to give readers here the opportunity to see some of it. Soon, probably early next year, I will publish a short story collection that will include many of these stories, but they are being published here for the first time. So readers of The Granite Notebook get to see them before everybody else. :)

You can see the link now in the menu bar above, and you can Continue reading

The ‘Never’ Cut

'never' cut

the ‘Never’ Cut + sand : raw, virgin hair untouched by scissors and tools of any kind

So… sometime this summer I did a new hairstyle thing. One day I shaved my face and then I shaved my head, and then I thought, ‘Well, I’ll just never cut or trim any of this again.’ Let it all grow out even, the way it wants to, unfettered and un-harassed.

From where (sic) came the inspiration for this fantastic idea, you say? Partly, it was inspired by laziness. Partly, it was inspired by love of nature. Partly it was inspired by skepticism. But the larger truth is: it was inspired by babies! You know, babies whose hair is allowed to grow out all wild before they get their first haircut? Sometimes that actually looks pretty cool!
Continue reading